8 Weeks Pregnant

This week I've had a head cold and forgotten how much being unwell while pregnant knocked me around (as well as caring for an extremely active 3 year-old!).

I've started to get my head more around the idea of becoming a twin parent. It's scary, really scary. I've had feelings of ungratefulness, of despair, of loss (of the pregnancy I thought I might have had), but also incredible awe at what my body is doing.

Already I am starting to get a little bump that is visible in the mornings and highly obvious by the end of the day. I look like I did at 15-16 weeks pregnant with Rowan, and I'm only 8 weeks! I have plenty of stretching/pulling pangs but they're not cramping so I'm okay with that. Little reminders like that 'stitch' feeling when I twist or stand up too fast remind me that the muscles are growing and round ligament pain will probably become a reality sooner rather than later.

8 week twin bump

We have our first appointment with the obstetrician next Monday (I'll be 9.5 weeks then), he was the same doctor who I saw with my previous pregnancy and he is well-known for being hands off and a supporter of natural birth. From what I know of him, he will support a natural twin birth (providing that the first baby is head-down towards the end of pregnancy). So hopefully after discussion we get the clearance to at least try for this option. Natural birth with little intervention is important to me and I am proud that Rowan's birth was exactly what I wanted. I understand that this time around might be a little different and with time, I think I'll be okay if that's what it comes to.

It floors me that in as little as 4-5 weeks we might know whether these babies are boys or girls. I'm very interested in knowing at the moment, whereas before becoming pregnant I was adamant about waiting until the birth! How times change... 

7 Weeks... it's TWINS!

Yesterday we discovered at our first ultrasound that there are in fact TWO babies on the way!

On the trip  home from the scan Matt and I started discussing the logistics of not being able to fit three child/baby seats across the back of our car and what that would most likely mean for our family (I don't like driving huge cars/4WDs), double prams, and will we ever get any sleep again after the babies are born?!

However, it's all so far away (and yet.... it isn't!) and as we're both thinkers (as opposed to do-ers) it's time to start talking about it. Then there's the fun part of coming up with extra baby names (squee!) and deciding such things as finding out the sex of the babies before they're born. We were leaning towards waiting until birth to find out had there been one baby, but now that there's two we'll probably find out for practicality reasons. Not that I'm displeased with that, unconsciously I think I probably wanted to know anyway.

Three children when both Matt and I saw our family with two? If this all works out, we are definitely done now!!

So here is what we know so far:

• The babies are identical
• Our single embryo split into two before it implanted into my uterus (basically a 48-hour window between the embryo being thawed and implantation beginning)
• Each baby has their own amniotic sac (a VERY good thing, I'm so relieved!)
• The babies share a placenta (so there is a potential risk of twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome developing, worst case scenario)
• My due date is still in early March, but it's likely that they could come in Jan/Feb, depending on how everything goes (scary...)
• I'll be monitored more closely because of the twin pregnancy, mostly through ultrasounds (which could be as often as every 2-3 weeks)
• This will make one heck of a pregnancy scrapbook!

When it was all sinking in yesterday (put it this way, Matt's initial responses to the ultrasound technician telling us that the embryo had split and there were two babies was a loud "OH SHIT!", and I could barely say a word except for muttering "TWO! ..... TWO! ..... TWO!"), my best friend gave me a good laugh. She said that the weakest of our embryos (as I called it, this one took 6 days to get to the 5-day blastocyst stage suitable for freezing) thought "I'll show them..." and went above and beyond the call.

And indeed it did! It also made me realise that this little one decided upon the stealthy 'divide and conquer' approach to survive, so now I have dubbed their collective tummy name as 'The Overlords'. No peas in a pod around here, that's for sure!

(and it's amused me today because I can throw random comments into the conversation such as "the overlords are hungry" and "the mission for uterine domination continues". Ahh, small things :P)

So here they are, meet the Overlords, both measuring at 6w5d (Rowan always measured two days smaller also).

In the picture, you can see one yolk sac in front of the other (the circles in the middle), with a baby at the top and bottom.

5 Weeks Pregnant

After using the last of our four frozen embryos (from 2010), a very straightforward transfer followed and the wait to the pregnancy blood test begun. 

There were a few things we did differently this time which may or may not have contributed to finally getting that elusive implantation:

• Acupuncture (immediately before and following the embryo transfer)
• Progesterone support (400mg pessary, twice daily)
• Dilatation & curettage (D&C) in the month prior to our transfer cycle 
• Herbal support from my naturopath (I have a post-transfer mix that I take 3 times daily)
• Keeping a consistent body temperature (no super-hot showers or very cold foods/drinks for 5 days following the transfer; blastocysts are temperature-sensitive)
• Taking it easy (no heavy lifting)

I'd like to hope that one or several of these things tipped the scale in our favour (or simply, that what we thought was our least strong embryo - left until last - was the one that actually came through for us). 

I am on progesterone support for rest of the first trimester and while it's a bit yucky, if it means a healthy pregnancy for the next couple of months then I will gladly continue it.

I found out about this pregnancy at 6dp5dt, I had a temperature shift (37.3C from 36.8C) following a day of mild cramping (I put this down to implantation in hindsight) and woke up in the middle of the night with a rapidly beating heart and sense of something being 'different' in my body. This intuition was pretty much how I realised I was pregnant with our son (now aged 3) so immediately recognised it. I got up and took a test... and sure enough it was positive!

This wasn't the original in-the-middle-of-the-night test, but
instead one I took the next day to confirm BFP.

Normally I wouldn't test so early during a FET cycle but the signs were too strong for me to ignore. I am sensitive to HCG and have a strong sense of what's going on in my own body. In our other (unsuccessful) transfers, there haven't been any moments like this, just continued failed cycles after 5, 6 or 7 days post-transfer (another reason I pushed our IVF specialist for progesterone, following self-research). 

I have had two blood tests recently - one at 10dp5dt (15DPO) and another at 16dp5dt (21DPO). The first came back with HCG=198 / Progesterone=128. The second showed HCG=1600 / Progesterone=100. I have one more blood test in a week's time, and then our first ultrasound (!!) booked for 7w0d to confirm sac and heartbeat etc.

In the meantime I'm continuing to parent our three year-old son while starting to get hit with tiredness (hello Nana nap!), queasiness in the afternoon and growing breasts (I'm small up top to begin with so changes there are generally pretty obvious). I've taken a 'beginning' belly picture but won't post it just yet until I've got something to compare it to - last pregnancy I took pictures weekly but this time I think I'll do it every two weeks (or at least in the earlier stages).

My due date is March 5th, 2015 (two days shy of my 33rd birthday). :)

12 Weeks (!!)

Today I had my first appointment with the obstetrician and he surprised us with a quick ultrasound....cue much excitement (and nervousness!) on my part!
We got to see our baby on the screen.... not a blob, but a fully-formed (but tiny) baby! Sure, this picture doesn't quite do the experience justice, but it was amazing to see it moving around on the screen. In fact, the obstetrician commented on how active he/she was, and that may be a sign of things to come.... oh my! :O

Measuring three days ahead too - it must have our tall genes... I've never been so proud. :)




(Not the clearest angle, but here's our little one's second picture! (head to the left, legs to the right)
We have our 'proper' scan next week, so I'll be sure to update then.



And my twelve week tummy picture. Nearly out of the first trimester!!

P.S. - Hubby and I made the pregnancy public on Facebook tonight, now it's officially out there. :)

11.5 Weeks

I'm on school holidays from teaching at the moment (bliss!) so there's been a bit of relaxing as well as catching up with friends and family. I've been thoroughly enjoying my time off - still another week to go - and then it will be (hopefully) my last Term of classroom teaching before office duties for Feb/March next year before starting maternity leave. Can't get too ahead of myself though, I'll be meeting with management at some point in October or November to discuss exactly what the beginning of next year will bring (I'm due at a tricky time, with not being eligible for maternity leave until 4 weeks into the school year).

Lots of changes this week, including:
- A couple of bouts of (mild) random quasiness
- Light-headedness if I don't eat every two hours
- A total of 3kg gained so far this pregnancy
- The potential beginnings of colostrum (!)

Our first appointment with our obstetrician is on Wednesday, with our next ultrasound the following week (October 5th). So hopefully exciting times ahead!

P.S. - I think it's nearly time to (sadly) put away my favourite jeans:

10 Weeks

Well, here I am (roughly) 25% of the way through this pregnancy already. In one way it's been a very fast time, but in other ways it's been a slow crawl - ie, the IVF cycle that seemed to last six weeks, all the blood tests, waiting for an ultrasound, everything else that comes along with the first trimester etc.

And suddenly, wham... there's the beginning of a (tiny) tummy. It's hard to believe that these two pictures were taken only two weeks apart, or that I'm 5'11" to begin with and have quite a long waist. Genetics should tell me that I can't possibly be showing yet, but sure enough there are genuine changes here.

Image as proof (I debated about leaving my head in or cutting it out, then thought "bugger it") -

Hard to me to deny this, hey?

It's almost the term break at work, so with another three weeks under my belt I wonder if any further changes will be obvious by the time we come back in the beginning of October? It will be t-shirt weather very soon in Melbourne, so creative dressing may be appropriate until it's time to announce things formally.

Either way, these changes would probably explain why I've been feeling lots of pulls and tiny cramps (not in a bad way) lately.

9.5 Week Belly

This is what I'm seeing by the evenings lately, I've had lots of 'pulling' pains/twinges and the urge to wee has been stronger again in the last few days. My favourite pair of jeans are holding on for dear life!

Hubby and I had our first discussion about names the other night, he brought up a list I'd mentioned about names I'd liked during the years and then crossed off along the way. It turns out that there are at least a couple of girls names we agree partway on, but so far nothing for boys. Hopefully for our sake this little one turns out to be a girl (if my instinct is correct, then it will be the case!).

9 Weeks

I'm nine weeks today, with only one month to go until I'm out of the first trimester!

After getting over the initial shock of discovering that we were pregnant at the beginning of August, the last five weeks have been an interesting time: the never-ending appetite (including massive cravings for cheese that have only been getting stronger!), countless toilet trips, the tiredness and more. Morning sickness has been kind to me so far, with only a few queasy moments to date (my Mum jokes that I'll be in for it later down the track).

We have our first appointment with a hands-off obstetrician (who comes highly recommended) on September 29th, and our twelve-week scan on October 5th. Hubby wants to come to both, which I think is really quite sweet (though little does he know yet that I'll be having to take a urine sample to the OB appointment!).

The little bloaty bump that I posted last week has hung around, which leads me to believe that it's the beginning of something real. Skinny jeans have been put to the back of the wardrobe in favour of fitted pants with a little more stretch to them - hopefully these get me by for another 1-2 months, or until it's warm enough here for skirts/shorts again! (secretly I'm glad to be having a Summer baby because my wardrobe is more suited for it, with me probably only having to buy a few pieces here and there).

Anyway, enough of vanity, that's this week's update. ;)

8 Weeks

The last week has been a whirlwind affair, starting off with the all-important first ultrasound which made me cry when I got to see this on the screen:

Pregnancy at 7 weeks & 0 days

With a heartbeat of 133bpm, it was truly a beautiful sight to behold (even if it's difficult to make anything out yet). This little one was measuring ahead, which the technician said could either be because of our genes (I'm 6'0" and hubby is 6'2" - or in metric terms, 181cm and 186cm!) or that the blastocyst implanted early. Either way, I feel proud already. :)

We have officially 'graduated' from the IVF clinic and are currently in the process of being referred to more local care at a nearby private hospital. Our last HCG blood test results were really good, with the numbers being in the 105,000's! :O

Both families now know about the pregnancy and everyone seems thrilled for us! I'm ecstatic we've been able to share the good news with them all (even if we're not making it completely public until after our 12wk ultrasound).

I've been sleeping a lot more lately (tending to nap at about 3pm when I get the chance) and morning sickness is still fairly non-existant (I've only had a couple of days where I've woken up a little queasy).

And I think that's my update?

Oh wait, I forgot to show you what's appeared during the last week, a little teeny-tiny (probably all bloat) protrusion:

Ultrasound is Tomorrow

Tomorrow marks the land of no return... the first ultrasound. Will there be a sac? Will there be a manatee-shaped human-to-be inside? Will there be a heartbeat?

I'm on edge because I'm still in that limbo between being treated for infertility and so-called 'normal' pregnancy. I'm seeing a reproductive endocrinologist (tomorrow will mark the second-last visit before graduating to more local care) and will be joined in the waiting room tomorrow by a variety of women - some of whom might be in a similar situation to me, or midway through an IVF cycle - or their assisted reproduction journey may be just beginning.

In plainer English, I'm a little scared, more than a little cautious and hope that above anything tomorrow brings good news.

...and for the time being I place my hands carefully over my lower abdomen as if to protect the life that I think is going on within right now. Pregnant until proven otherwise.

6 Weeks Today

I've been keeping a lower online presence everywhere lately, I'm not sure why though I think dwindling energy levels might have something to do with it.

Today marks being six weeks pregnant, which to me is my first mini-milestone. I'm so proud of my body for doing what it should be, now that I'm off all drugs/medications related to the IVF (just on natural-based supplements, prescribed by my naturopath). Last week I had more blood work done that proved my HCG levels are rising (9014 vs 793 a week ago!). Progesterone was down a little, but still within normal range - the nurse that's probably because I'm off progesterone supplements now. I have one more blood test next week and then I get the all-clear for a while. :)

In other exciting-to-me news, hubby and I will be getting a super early sneak peek at how this little one is doing next Tuesday (which I hope brings news of a strongly-beating heart and everything measuring on schedule). Our first ultrasound! I've had many during the couse of the last few years, but only of an empty uterus.... this is completely different and I'll be ecstatic for good news *keeps fingers tightly crossed*.

Also this week we need to decide on what kind of birthing care I'll be having, as our IVF specialist will be writing a referral shortly. Then we'll be officially be done with the clinic and continuing pregnancy care locally. It all feels too early to be planning these things - after all, I've only just found out that I'm pregnant! Originally I was interested in midwife-led care, but now I'm considering other options too. I've been recommended a couple of hands-off obstetricians which sound like a good fit for me, and I know that at least one of them accepts IVF women *thumbs up*.

So now we wait a little bit, and hope that next Tuesday brings good news (yes, it's all about the waiting, waiting, waiting!).

P.S. - My stomach turned yesterday at the smell of disintegrating rubber gloves. Hoping this isn't a sign of things to come!

5 Weeks Today

It feels as though I've known about being pregnant for ages, but in reality it's only been a week and-a-half. The trouble with knowing so early is that there is longer to wait to make real progress.

But then again, every week is progress, and closer to the goals of staying pregnant and birthing a baby (which sounds strange to say because my goal for the last couple of years has been to actually get pregnant!).

I've had a cold this week, which has been knocking me around, and my appetite continues to be big (metabolism, I suppose??). No sign of sickly feelings as yet, so I'll be keeping my fingers crossed that this continues.

Two days until the blood test which hopefully confirms that my HCG levels are rising properly, and 15 days until our dating ultrasound. This is the big one for me... it'll all feel more real then. Hubby is excited, I'm so rapt to see him feeling happy about what's happening (did I doubt otherwise, I'm not sure?!).

HCG Levels

What a wonderful day.... my pregnancy has been confirmed by blood test!!

I was right on the money (4w 2d) with my dates, with my levels being -

HCG: 793
Progesterone: 391

The nurse said that those levels are looking really good! Now to have another blood test next week, and my first ultrasound is scheduled for August 24th (6w 6d). Great timing, as two days after that hubby and I will be flying to visit the in-laws to tell them the good news! :D

P.S. - I told my best friend about our news over lunch today, predictably she cried! I know she's going to be the best non-related auntie ever! ;)

On Why I Love Carrots

Symptoms to date: Lots of weeing. Tiredness. Big appetite. Thirst. Carrots are yummy.

It's funny, I've only known I'm pregnant for five days but I feel so attached to the mass of cells that are growing inside of me, and hope that they make it to this side of the world. I know it's wrong to feel like this already, but this is something the hubby and I have wanted for so long -- and strived for. We like to succeed in all facets of life and fertility is no exception. Now I'm growing a baby and trying to do the best that I can. :)

There are 11 hours to go until my blood test, and I'll find out the results 5-6 hours after that. Very nervous despite knowing in my heart that we'll have a good result (hopefully enough to go off the progesterne, but won't be devestated if I have to stay on it... I'm thankful we've gotten this far).

I've told a few close online friends and decided to be an active part of a forum I've been a part of for a couple of years (after the initial endometriosis diagnosis). There are other women who are in the very early stages of pregnancy like me, and it feels good to share in this experience with other people. And to validate my thoughts... that it's okay to feel attached. :)

Tomorrow I'm lunching with my best friend and I plan on giving her the good news in person. I know she'll be rapt (she can't wait until the day when she and her partner have a baby of their own), and will probably wonder why I'm spilling the beans so early. I questioned a good friend who said the same thing once and she said that if anything were to 'go wrong' she'd rather the love and support of others around her, rather than trying to cope alone.

I tend to agree with her, so this is why my best friend and I will be jumping around in excitement together this time tomorrow. ;)

No Doubting This Response...

Who would have thought it? After yesterday's very faint positive on an internet cheapie strip, I bought myself a First Response test and.... well, there's no doubting that result. I'm pregnant!

Before I get ahead of myself there is Thursday's blood test to get through, and early ultrasound after that. But wow, I never thought I'd get this far so fast - I feel so bleesed!

Hubby and I are trying not to think ahead, but we can't help but talk about when we'll tell both sets of parents (probably at the 7 week mark, since his parents live interstate and we'll be seeing them in person for the first time this year in a month's time). Interestingly, that means also keeping "the secret" from my own mother until then, someone that I'm very close to. My guess is that she'll figure it out, but we'll just have to see. As I said, a month is a long time away and we don't even know yet whether this little one is meant for the world (I think she it is).

P.S. - The urge to pee very frequently on Saturday night made me realise that maybe my period wasn't on the way after all. That and a general feeling of 'oddness'. Since then, the peeing han't stopped (I've been waking up at least twice a night needing to use the toilet) and this morning I haven't felt all that hungry but have eaten my bran cereal anyway. Isn't it too early for all of this?

I worked out my dates, and I'm only a tad over 4 weeks...